These 3 years of pandemic have taught me so much about myself and others. We always talk about getting rid of the leaves and dead branches in our lives. I’ve learned that sometimes we have re-plant the entire tree to get better roots and better results. This I’m just realizing. It was a light bulb moment for sure. The tree was kind of like in a bucket and not growing. Now it’s being planted near other viable plants to help it grow.
As the year ended I reflected on not just this past year but also the past few years. It was like removing toxic blinders. Or better yet, I stopped taking the blue pill. I saw things how they really were. Doing that, you sometimes create an amazing hybrid.
I know some of the events I caused or even allowed to happen. I have this habit of giving people multiple chances thinking they will change, yet knowing they wouldn’t.
There’s no time like the present to make changes and fix the situation. As each year begins I see and hear the same thing. “I’m going to cut them off at me beginning of the year.”
First, why wait? Do it now. Sometimes I understand it maybe fear causing person to wait. My thought on that is, they didn’t wait until the beginning of the year to become toxic. Occasionally you may care just a bit too much or have attachment concerns.
Second do you clean your house once a year? Or do you do it often throughout the year? Negative behavior doesn’t get rewarded with ice cream and candy.
The beginning of the pandemic started right after going back to work following my surgery. I was already fed up by that point and started cutting people off. However, it wasn’t a year in that I realized I needed to make more drastic changes. Crazy that it took me getting focus to see that. Now I see one of my “roots” is deadly and needs to neutered and neutralized before causing more harm.
I love my family and close friends. Still I understand not everyone can continue on the journey with me. You know what? I’m okay with that. After all, everyone isn’t supposed to be there for a lifetime. Just as when someone falls asleep in death, we learn to move forward. This emotional death is no different, I will move forward. New roots are being planted each and everyday.